Interesting Story

The town fathers were looking for a way to increase attendance and participation at their regular meetings. One member suggested bringing in a hypnotist. The officials agreed, a famous hypnotist was hired, publicity distributed, and everyone was pleased.

A few weeks later the meeting hall was packed, and the town's people sat fascinated as the hypnotist withdrew a pocket watch. The hypnotist began chanting... "Watch the watch, watch the watch, watch the watch..."

The crowd became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth, light gleaming off its polished surface. Hundreds of pairs of eyes followed the swaying watch, until suddenly the hypnotist's fingers slipped and the watch fell to the floor...

"Shit" said the hypnotist.

It took three weeks to clean up the town hall.

Software Engineer's Daily Routine

Software Engineer's Daily Routine (When there is no work!!)
 
8:30AM: wake up

8:45AM: Tough decision; to bath or not.

8:50AM: Have To.

9:15AM: Punch in.

9:20AM: Check Mail.

9:25AM: Check Again just in case...

9:30AM: Since It is already 9:30 wait for tea (9:45AM).

9:45AM: TEA party.

10:00AM: Check Mail.

10:05AM: Check again. Can't believe that no mail has come. Is every body dead or what?

10:20AM: Sudden feeling of loneliness and desperation turn around to look for some body (Any body) to talk to.

10:30AM: Found a guy testing something. Feel real pity for his pathetic, boring and useless existence.

10:40AM: Sudden urge to get some work done and fast. Start looking for the file.(Can't remember it's name)

11:00AM: Boss summons in his office. Bad sign.

11:30AM: How the hell! Am I supposed to remember everything? Why should I be responsible for everything that goes bad?

11:45AM: Try to locate a scapegoat. No body around.

12:00AM: Mood is really bad decided to postpone work till after lunch.

12:30AM: lunch

1:00PM: Lunch over.

1:10PM: Go for a smoke. Can't even smoke in this god forsaken place.

1:35PM: Back from a smoke. It was good. I even did not pay for the cig. The other chap is so foolish.

1:50PM: Mood is good. Decide to go to cool web sites. Real sleazy thoughts.

2:30PM: Feeling real sleepy after such a mammoth mental effort.

2:45PM: Tea Time.

3:00PM: Chat and discuss with colleague on the bad state of the company. Blame everybody for incompetence and laziness

4:00PM: A guy from testing comes for help.(Jerk)

4:11PM: Try to look busy.

4:12PM: He is asking for a technical help.(Real jerk).

4:15PM: After really making him beg for help decide to take a look.

4:50PM: No solution found. Really angry on the guy for getting myself involved.

4:55PM: Suddenly boss is spotted in the neighboring area. Try making as much loud noise as possible with some obscure technical jargon thrown in.

5:00PM: Boss has gone back to his den. Coast is clear.

5:05PM: Blame the problem on RnD.

5:10PM: Check mail. "Yes" a mail has finally arrived.

5:13PM: It's a silly joke and old too. But it felt good.

5:14PM: a quick dash for gate.

5:15PM: Third in punching out..ha ha ha  ha..


"Juice peneka...Carrom khelneka ..Majaa ki life........he he he...."

Definitions of Designations

Definitions of Designations:
 

• Project Manager is a Person who thinks nine women can deliver a baby in One month.

 

• Developer is a Person who thinks it will take 18 months to deliver a Baby.

 

• Onsite Coordinator is one who thinks single woman can deliver nine babies in one month.

 

• Client is the one who doesn't know why he wants a baby.

 

• Marketing Manager is a person who thinks he can deliver a baby even if no man and woman are available.

 

• Resource Optimization Team thinks they don't need a man or woman; they'll produce a child with zero resources.

 

• Documentation Team thinks they don't care whether the child is delivered, they'll just document 9 months.

 

• Quality Auditor is the person who is never happy with a delivered baby.

 

• Tester is a person who always tells that this is not the Right baby.

 

HR Manager is a person who thinks that... a Donkey can deliver a Human Baby - if given 9 Months !!! 

Unnecessary Advice.... :P

Once a Smoker was smoking at the airport.........A gentleman came & asked him. How much do you smoke a day?

Smoker:- Why are you asking such question?

 Gentleman :-If you had collected that money instead of smoking, the plane which is in front of you, would have been yours.

Smoker asked that gentleman:- Do you smoke? Gentleman:-No.

Smoker asked:- does that plane belong to you?

Gentleman:- No.

Smoker:-Thanks for your kind advice, but that plane is mine [Smoker's Name-Vijay Mallya].

Moral of the Story:-Unnecessary advice is injurious to health…   :P

Worth reading !!!!!

o        India is the world's largest, oldest, continuous civilization.

o        India never invaded any country in her last 10000 years of history.

o        India is the world's largest democracy.

o        Varanasi, also known as Benares, was called "the ancient city" when Lord Buddha visited it in 500 B.C.E, and is the oldest, continuously inhabited city in the world today.

o        India invented the Number System. Zero was invented by Aryabhatta.

o        The World's first university was established in Takshashila in 700BC. More than 10,500 students from all over the world studied more than 60 subjects. The University of Nalanda built in the 4th century BC was one of the greatest achievements of ancient India in the field of education.

o        Sanskrit is the mother of all the European languages. Sanskrit is the most suitable language for computer software - a report in Forbes magazine, July 1987.

o        Ayurveda is the earliest school of medicine known to humans. Charaka, the father of medicine consolidated Ayurveda 2500 years ago. Today Ayurveda is fast regaining its rightful place in our civilization.

o        Although modern images of India often show poverty and lack of development, India was the richest country on earth until the time of British invasion in the early 17th Century. Christopher Columbus was attracted by India's wealth.

o        The art of Navigation was born in the river Sindhu 6000 years ago. The very word Navigation is derived from the Sanskrit word NAVGATIH. The word navy is also derived from Sanskrit 'Nou'.

o        Bhaskaracharya calculated the time taken by the earth to orbit the sun hundreds of years before the astronomer Smart. Time taken by earth to orbit the sun: (5th century) 365.258756484 days.

o        The value of pi was first calculated by Budhayana, and he explained the concept of what is known as the Pythagorean Theorem. He discovered this in the 6th century long before the European mathematicians.

o        Algebra, trigonometry and calculus came from India. Quadratic equations were by Sridharacharya in the 11th century. The largest numbers the Greeks and the Romans used were 106 whereas Hindus used numbers as big as 10**53(10 to the power of 53) with specific names as early as 5000 BCE during the Vedic period. Even today, the largest used number is Tera 10**12(10 to the power of 12).

o        IEEE has proved what has been a century old suspicion in the world scientific community that the pioneer of wireless communication was Prof. Jagdish Bose and not Marconi.

o        The earliest reservoir and dam for irrigation was built in Saurashtra.

o        According to Saka King Rudradaman I of 150 CE a beautiful lake calledSudarshana was constructed on the hills of Raivataka during Chandragupta Maurya's time.

o        Chess (Shataranja or AshtaPada) was invented in India.

o        Sushruta is the father of surgery. 2600 years ago he and health scientists of his time conducted complicated surgeries like cesareans, cataract, artificial limbs, fractures, urinary stones and even plastic surgery and brain surgery. Usage of anesthesia was well known in ancient India. Over 125 surgical equipment were used. Deep knowledge of anatomy, physiology, etiology, embryology, digestion, metabolism, genetics and immunity is also found in many texts.

o        When many cultures were only nomadic forest dwellers over 5000 years ago, Indians established Harappan culture in Sindhu Valley (Indus Valley Civilization).

o        The four religions born in India, Hinduism, Buddhism, Jainism, and Sikhism, are followed by 25% of the world's population.

o        The place value system, the decimal system was developed in India in 100 BC.

o        India is one of the few countries in the World, which gained independence without violence.

o        India has the second largest pool of Scientists and Engineers in the World.

o        India is the largest English speaking nation in the world.

o        India is the only country other than US and Japan, to have built a super computer indigenously

Good one.... :-)

There was a good old barber in Bangalore . One day a florist goes to
him for a haircut. After the cut, he goes to pay the barber and the
barber replies:
I am sorry, I cannot accept money from you; I am doing a Community
Service.
Florist is happy and leaves the shop.

The next morning when the Barber goes to open his shop, there is a
"Thank You" Card and a dozen roses waiting at his door.

A Confectioner goes for a haircut and he also goes to pay the barber he
again refuses to take the money.
The Confectioner is happy and leaves the shop.

The next morning when the Barber goes to open his shop, there is
another "Thank you" Card and a dozen Cakes waiting at
his door.


A Software Engineer goes for a haircut and he also goes to pay the
barber again refuses the money saying that it was a community service.

The next morning when the Barber goes to open his
shop, guess what he finds there......


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A Dozen Software engineers waiting for a free haircut... with Printouts
of Forwarded mail mentioning about free hair cut with the google map
showing the shop.

Very Funny First divorce just after 9/11

A love story of an Engineering student……….

A guy was deeply in love with his classmate.
One day he proposed her by saying that he loved her a lot….
But she was angry and refused and threatened him that she'd complain to the Principal if he ever bothers her again.
One day the girl borrowed a text book from that boy and wrote a message “I love you too, I'm sorry to hurt you the other day. if u've forgiven me, please come and talk to me and never leave me.” in that book.
But the guy never talked to her.
4 years went away and nothing has happened..
 
Moral of the story:
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Engineering boys never open their
books!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Year 3000

Year 3000  

These are really wonderful animated GIFs which gives a preview of our future. In this highly technology dependant world, its very well possible that many of these devices may get innovated in the near future. Take a look at the below images: 

  

Communication.......Good One

Arab son sends an e-mail to his Dad saying:
Dear Dad,
Berlin is wonderful, people are nice and I really like it here,
but Dad,  I am bit ashamed to arrive to my college with my Gold Mercedes, when all my Teachers travel by train.
Your Son
Nasser

Sometime later Nasser gets reply to his e-mail from his Dad:
Loving son,
Twenty Million Dollars transferred to your account, please stop embarrassing us, go and get yourself a train too.
Your Dad

How to Sleep During Office Hours

After completing 50 years...

BARBIE

TWEETY

SUPERMAN

Thor

Hulk

Wonder Women

Batman and Robin

SPIDERMAN

A river under a river

In Cenote Angelita - Mexico, There is an underwater river. Under water rivers can be found in a cave, if you dive up to 30 meters depth, the water is fresh water, but if you dive 60 meters the water becomes salt water, therefore creating a "river" complete with trees and foliage. However this is not unusual because the river is a river of hydrogen sulfide layer that looks like a river. Hydrogen sulfide, H2S, is a coulourless gas, toxic, flammable and smells like rotten eggs. These gases can arise from biological activity when bacteria break down organic material in a state without oxygen (anaerobic activity), such as in the swamp, the sea and sewage. Gas was also featured on the gas arising from volcanic activity as natural gas.
 
As seen in the pictures the sensation that we can get is a unique natural phenomenon.

Animals need you this Summer

Summer is here and its going to be equally harsh to the animals around us. Kindly do your tiny bit by keeping a bowl of fresh water out side your balcony or garden.
AT 120 DEGREES IN AUSTRALIA , IT WAS SO HOT FOR A WEEK THAT KOALAS WERE ASKING PEOPLE FOR WATER . IT'S NEVER BEEN SEEN BEFORE.   (for larger view click on the image) "Until one has loved an animal, part of their soul remains unawakened."