Tension..........................!!!!!!!!!!

Tension

  
   

What is Tension? 
  
A beautiful girl asks lift from you.  On the way she faints and you take her to hospital. 
  
Doctor says ‘Congrats. You are going to become a father.
 

  
  
  
  

  
THAT’S IT. YOU GET TENSED. 
  
You say – ‘But that baby is not mine.’ 
Girl says – ‘he is only the father of my baby.’ 
  
  
  

  
 

YOU HAVE MORE TENSION. 
 
Police comes and DNA test is done. Report comes. Which says that you can never become a father. 
  
EVEN MORE TENSION FOR YOU. 

  
  

 
 

Anyhow you thank God and return home.  Then you think,  “At home I have 2 kids. Whose are those?” 
  
  
  
  
THIS IS REAL TENSION.  

 
  
  

Nice One!!!

One fat guy -


One fat guy - goes to a popular GYM in Bangalore sees an ad for a new gym guaranteeing to reduce anyone's weight by 5, 10 or 20 kilograms on the first day. So he goes and tells them he wants to lose 5 kg. They lead him into a huge gym with all kinds of ropes and parallel bars and ladders and tell him to wait a minute.


He's standing there when on the far side of the gym a door opens and out steps a beautiful girl, with a sign saying "If you catch me, I'm yours." He starts running, and just as he gets close, she starts picking up speed.


Before he knows it, he's running all over the gym, up the ladders, down the ladders, across the parallel bars, here and there. And just as he's about to catch the blonde, pop, she disappears through a door. In comes the management who lead him to the showers, and then weigh him. Sure enough, he lost exactly 5 kg.


He's back on the street and starts to think.


"Jesus, I was so close to catching her. If I had a little more time..."


So he races back to the gym and says, "I want to lose 20 more kg."


"No problem," says the manager.


Again he is led to the large gym. This time he's standing by the door

when it opens. Out comes a Gorilla with a sign.


"If I catch you, you're mine."

Horrible PJ's (Pls Dont blame me)

EK  aadmi ki 6 ungliyan(6 fingers) hoti hain... sab log use "Hanuman" bulate hain... kyun???
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Ans:kyounki uska nam hanuman hota hai!




what is PJ???























phaltu joke..





















what is P+iJ ???





















complex phaltu joke...
























why dont we laugh on a it???

























coz the joke part is imaginary!!!







Whats the opposite of Real??






























Its COCONUT....
































Y....Socho...???


































Becuase it is 'Na-Real'  


i'll write a book an pjs and dedicate it to whom? our president....why
scroll down for answer
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coz he is mr . a.P.J.abdul kalam

what is the vector form of sridevi????
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ANS : - TABU!!!!

confused???? why????
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ok i'l tell you...

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. sridevi did chandni and tabu did chandni bar!!!!!

What would Dharmendra say to Hema Malini if he wants to tell her to call
him up...?

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Ring De Basanti :))


A dentist was examining a patient having a highly contageous deadly disease....
As soon he opens the patients mouth the disease gets transferred to the doctor... how??






...Because the patient had a bluetooth!!





three cockroaches were going on the road, suddenly one of them started singing the song -- AASHIQ BANAYA AAPNE.

Few mins later, all the three cockroaches died......any idea why?????



COZ the song is HIT......

Deadly PJ's

Q: Why is Sunday stronger than Monday?

Its because....

Monday is a Weak Day....
_____________________________________

Q: Which is the safest way to see a shark?

Ans: On Television....
_____________________________________

A FANTASTIC PJ:
Q: What would Baby Corn say To Mom Corn?
 

Ans: He'll ask:
"Where is Pop Corn?"

______________________________ _______

Q: What is the full form of CNBC ???
 

Ans: It means....
Cartoon Network for Business Community !!

______________________________ _______

Q: Do u know what is the meaning of PYAR?
 

Ans: Some friends sitting on the table in a BAR.....
& saying.....
"P - YAAR"

______________________________ _______

Q1) What is it that RAM can do but RAVAN cant?

Ans: Wear a T-SHIRT.


Q2) What is it that RAVAN can do but RAM cant?
 

Ans: Group discussion when he is alone.

______________________________ _______

Q: Why did Ram Gopal Varma made 'Phoonk'?

ANS: Uski Picchli 'AAG' ko bujhaane ke liye....

______________________________ _______

Q: What do u call a 800 year old Hanuman Temple???
 

Ans: MARUTI 800!!!

______________________________ _______

Dharam Paaji subscribed to Hutch. But the hutch network did not follow him.
Why?
 

Ans: Bcoz the Dog was afraid,
'Kutte! Main tera khoon pee jaunga.'

______________________________ _______

Q: Agar Bengali ka phone kat jaaye, to woh kya kahega?
 

Ans: Kol-Kata.....

______________________________ _______

Q: Dada Kondake opened a Bank in the memory of his Mother's Grandmother
i.e. Great Grandmother.
What did he name the bank?
 

Ans: "I CHI I CHI I" Bank.

______________________________ _______

Q: Ek Kaana Ladka kisi ladki ko propose kare to kaunsa song gaayega?
 

Ans: Ek NAZAR se bhi pyar hota hai, Maine suna hai....

______________________________ _______

Bear this PJ !!
Q: What is the difference between Paneer Masala and Paneer 'Tikka' Masala??
 

Simple!

Ans: The Latter is Vaccinated...!!

______________________________ _______

Q: Why does the BAA of "Kyunki Saas bhi Kabhi Bahu thi" never die?


Ans: Coz God Never Dies....
 

Confused?
 

BAA 'KHUDA' TUMHI HO!

______________________________ _______

Q: If Bill Gate's mother gets bored, What will u call her?
 

Ans: MOTHER-BOARD!

______________________________ _______

Q: Why did the Tightrope Walker visit the ATM?


Ans: To check his balance....

______________________________ _______

UNBEATABLE PJ:

Q: According to Gabbar, Sher Ka Bacha Kaun hai??


ANS: HOLI.
 

How?

Coz....
He Keeps Saying...
"Holi CUB hai,
CUB hai Holi...."